Cops save nation from dastardly speech therapists’ sheep

The Hong Kong Police National Security Department’s valiant Anti-Sheep Squad launch a heroic raid on speech therapists, arresting five of the sociopathic maniacs ‘on suspicion of conspiracy to publish and distribute seditious children’s books with the intent of inciting hatred against the government and instigating violence’.

The NatSec Dept’s Senior Superintendent (Allegorical Literature) Steve Li explains that in one of the books, Guardians of Sheep Village, sheep “…use their horns to attack. A sheep is such a kind-hearted animal, and they [producers of the book] have to say that it has some attack ability, and has to commit some violent acts.” Li is also concerned that the portrayal of wolves is inaccurate: “The books, for example, featured the wolves as throwing rubbish and spitting all over the place. In reality, is that even true?”

(Remember when Mainland censors banned the movie Babe because pigs shouldn’t talk? And since we’re being pedantic, is Li being truthful in claiming that sheep are ‘kind-hearted’? In my experience, they are not, particularly.)

The Guardian was among the first international media to break the story overseas – and no doubt reassure nervous investors that the Hong Kong Police are keeping the city free of subversive cartoon books that will turn kids into deviants. 

An illustrated audio version is here, and has over 110,000 views by Friday morning. (Warning: watching this video may make you hate the Hong Kong government – which you obviously never would have otherwise.)

Three predictions, or at least possibilities: the hitherto unnoticed (published over a year ago) village sheep will become a subversive companion-meme to LIHKG pig; speech therapists overseas will express solidarity, and the HK government will respond with a long whiny press release; Senior Superintendent (Children’s Cartoons) Steve Li will be awarded a Silver Bauhinia Gallantry Medal.  

A few things for the weekend if you’re desperate…

From China Media Project, a translated account by someone who was stuck on the subway in Zhengzhou as flood water started to fill the tunnel and then the train. Doesn’t sound like fun.

Almost as hellish, a Sixth Tone report on an ‘exclusive’ culture-themed nouveau-riche-targeting beach-resort property-project apparently near Beidaihe. A reminder that China has ‘normal’ horrors too.

Fans of Babe might enjoy this discourse analysis of pigs in motion pictures – a PhD dissertation – that explores such themes as ‘pig agency’ in the film. (I said ‘might’.)

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20 Responses to Cops save nation from dastardly speech therapists’ sheep

  1. Joe Blow says:

    Don’t the National Insecurity police, and the HK Popo in general, realize that they are making fools of themselves and that nobody is taking them serious anymore?

  2. Chinese Netizen says:

    @Joe Blow: No. When you’re given unfettered power and promoted up to the top of the food chain, pushing others aside, you actually start believing the shit.

  3. Big Al says:

    The only people inciting me to hate the government and the CCP … are the government and the CCP. When can we expect them to arrest themselves?

  4. Mark Bradley says:

    Holy shit SCMP moderators are such fucking obnoxious cunts. Some blue ribbon knuckle dragger in the comments made the argument that youngsters today have less maturity than youngsters in the 70s (this is when the commenter was in their 20s) and that his generation had less maturity than his parents generation and that CCP “politicians” including even Xidada had to work the rice fields so they won’t entertain “5 demands not 1 less”,

    I post a rebuttal that said the following: 1. This is completely subjective and the 70s didn’t have stagnant wages nor completely unaffordable property 2. some people were more equal than others even during Maoist times and indeed Xidada was from a princeling family and had it better than most 3. did Polish people fighting the communist regime in 1980s Communist Poland also lack majority? Nothing I said violated SCMP terms. I posted this comment in the article about the “Rapture of relations at University of Hong Kong” between the administration and the student unions.

    The fucking brain dead idiot responded said blah blah blah there was a recession in the 1970s and nobody had it good in Maoist China not even Xi Jinping (yeah right, though to be fair he was denied a proper formal education). But what infuriated me is SCMP deleted my comment and ban my account. FUCK THESE CUNTS! (No I never use foul language on SCMP comments, but I’m a little more loose here since Hemmers has very free wheeling moderation as long as there is no spam)

    What is the likelihood that rag is going to completely collapse and clowns like Tammy Tam and Yonden Lhatoo will be out of a job? I am aware that Alibaba is being forced by the CCP to sell SCMP to another mainland firm so I am not super optimistic. I hate them more than state owned media (which I simply ignore) because they pretend to be objective. They still have “ok” articles once in a blue moon but they’ve gotten much worse after being acquired by Alibaba.

  5. Chinese Netizen says:

    @Mark: You said it yourself…it’s a shill propaganda rag. Let’s just sit back and watch the implosion as it takes along the sellouts that hitched their careers to that mule. Relax, buddy… not worth the blood pressure spike!

    I stopped looking at it ages ago.

  6. Knownot says:

    As Hemlock mentions, the offensive books are a year old, and many of the comments on the YouTube video are 6 months old. The police have made a gift to satirists, which is our good fortune. But by their own criteria, not only are they right to act, they were slow to act. That is their misfortune.

  7. Knownot says:

    For those interested in history.

    I am reading a book about Ancient Rome by Robert Payne. The Roman republic had been democratic in its way, but by about 100 B.C. one man, Cato, had almost complete control. Some things resonate here and now.

    “He saw to it that riots were put down mercilessly – even grumbling was punished – and in this way he earned the favour of the rich, who wanted above all an orderly and obedient people.”

    – – – – –

    “Senators feared him because as preserver of public morality he possessed sweeping powers and could call for their personal records and arrest them if he found any documents that displeased him.”

  8. YTSL says:

    “Holy shit SCMP moderators are such fucking obnoxious cunts.”

    @ Mark Bradley — The SCMP comments sections are moderated?

  9. Joe Blow says:

    Mark, welcome to reality. About 4 or 5 months ago, there was a BIG meeting in Beijing (People….blah blah …this or that). Tung Chee Wah was there, in his capacity as dim heir to a patriotic shipping fortune (that he almost ran into the ground) and he collapsed in the Great Hall of the Suppressed People. So I made a comment on Twitter: “Why don’t you just die, you old fool.” For this, I was banned from Twitter, suspended for all eternity. Boy, did I suddenly have a lot of time on my hands. I am still suspended and quite happy. Twitter is a waste of time, and so is the Alibaba Rag. There is no news in the Alibaba that you cannot get elsewhere. Just forget it exists (like most advertisers these days).

  10. speechtherapist says:

    Streisand effect, commence!

  11. Knownot says:

    When I commented this afternoon about the children’s books, I didn’t know that two of those arrested were being remanded in custody for more than a month. Here is a little more of the author’s assessment of Cato: “He was high-handed, vindictive, and always cautious, keeping to the letter of the law.” Part of that sentence, perhaps, can describe the Magistracy’s decision.

  12. steve says:

    YTSL: It’s more accurate to say that SCMP comments are censored. Mine also have been vaporized despite not violating the official guidelines. This plus Yonden and Alex et al plus the paywall has combined to ensure that I never even pop a glance at that rag these days. Mission accomplished, I guess.

  13. Red Dragon says:

    I’m astonished to find that certain of the sages who grace this comments section appear still to maintain faith in the SCMP, even to the point of believing that it will print their letters.

    Without wishing to lay claim to any degree of prescience, I washed my hands of this rag many years ago, and long before it became the mirror of the current unpleasantness which engulfs Hong Kong – the “Der Stürmer” of the Lam régime, if you will.

    Interestingly, as soon as I had spurned the Post, I found that my general sense of wellbeing increased dramatically, and I would encourage all others who continue to find themselves enraged by its enormities to do likewise. After all, the SCMP serves no purpose other than to insult the intelligence (if any) of those who persist in reading it.

    Believe me, the Post will do your head in. Ditch it now while you still have a few brain cells left.

  14. Low Profile says:

    I have Harry’s cartoons bookmarked, which saves me having to look at anything else in the SCMP. How long before he’s fired, I wonder?

    By the way, the sheep video is now marked as private.

  15. Probably says:

    Next film/book/comic to be banned will be that story of a rebel alliance defeating an evil empire. I believe it is called “Star Wars”.

  16. Chinese Netizen says:

    Good one, @Probably.

  17. Mary Melville says:

    Another ‘make it up as we go along’ regulation:

    24 Jul: Tiffany Yuen Punished to 10 Days in Special Unit for Hugging Fellow Inmates

    “On 20 Jul, former District Councillor Tiffany Yuen completed serving her sentence for inciting others to join an unauthorised assembly, remained in remand and returned to her previous remand cell. She had a good relationship with her fellow inmates, and some of them hugged her to show that they welcomed her return. Later that day, Yuen and five other inmates of that cell were punished to spend 10 days in solitary confinement in Special Unit (AKA “shui fan fong”). The reason for the move, according to Correctional Services Department staff, was “bodily contact with other inmates.”

    Yuen immediately asked the staff to point out which section of the Prisons Ordinance forbid bodily contact with inmates, and the staff said that they would reply her later, but had yet to tell her which section even until now. The staff even told Yuen that the “punishment was lightened”, since “hugging one person means a punishment of 5 days, so now it’s as if you only hugged 2 people.”

    Looking through the Prisons Ordinance, nowhere does it say that “bodily contact with other inmates” was in violation of the discipline in prisons. In fact, those remaining behind bars often engage in work and sports, meaning that contact with others is inevitable. The punishment by Lo Wu Correctional Institution on Yuen is absolutely ludicrous and contrary to common sense,

    Yuen must now remain in solitary confinement until the end of the month, during which, all of her benefits would be stripped, including no receiving of letter and newspapers, and even banning reading of books.”

    This a day after the CE on RTHK Backchat when questioned about comments she made to a closed-door meeting of business people in 2019 that were published “joked” that a law might be needed to curb such reporting.

    No doubt DoJ is already busy working on drafts that target both the above activities.

  18. Quentin Quarantino says:

    The anger of the people of Hong Kong who have been disenfranchised is boiling. Their displeasure may soon erupt into unknown ways, hitherto unrecognized.

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