RTHK to launch 24-hour Carrie Lam channel

RTHK looks for fresh new patriotic talent to replace the ideologically unacceptable old-style journalists with their boring insistence on factual and even critical content. The broadcaster’s latest recruit is renowned liberal Carrie Lam, who will present the Carrie Lam Daily Show, starring charismatic Carrie Lam hosting a wide range of interesting and exciting guests in the studio – including friends from the Toilet Paper Retail and other Election Committee sub-sectors. 

Among the topics under discussion: Belt and Road Opportunities, Bay Area Opportunities, housekeeping tips on how to improve your election system, and recipes for authentic traditional organic artisanal Hainan chicken rice, as passed down by generations of happy smiling poultry-loving Hainanese from the tropical island paradise of palm-fringed golf-courses, sun-kissed duty-free outlets, and boundless opportunities for our city’s youth. The first episode will also feature a highly meaningful National Security quiz with prizes of souvenir Octopus cards (with instructions on how to use them).

This is part of RTHK’s new commitment to ‘equal time’ – guaranteeing viewers equal amounts of Carrie Lam whether they tune in at midnight, dawn or noon.

Update: an audio feed of the rolling, non-stop, on-the-hour-every-hour, seven-days-a-week Carrie Lam In Your Face Every Day Show will also replace station announcements on the MTR and the ‘Yuu’ jingle in Wellcome supermarkets.

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16 Responses to RTHK to launch 24-hour Carrie Lam channel

  1. smiley says:

    Will she be introducing song requests from listeners? Could have lots of fun asking for:
    “Lunatics have taken over the Asylum”
    “Fool if you think it’s over”
    “Leaving on a jet plane”

  2. Real Boot Licker says:

    not North-Korean-esque at all; interesting aside – I heard Carrie Lam shot a world-beating -88 at the Discobay links the other week. The Water buffalo were literally in tears when she ascended into the clouds on her magnificent Red steed!

  3. Mark Bradley says:

    Put her show up on all of the digital billboards and jumbotrons in Hong Kong and she’ll be exactly like Dr Breen from Half Life 2 or if you prefer Big Brother from 1984.

  4. Chinese Netizen says:

    With less and less government-y stuff to do (commies running the actual show and all that), she’s gotta find some justification to “earn” that fucking massive salary handed by the tax payers!

  5. Chris Maden says:

    I do hope so much that she has a phone-in. Snitch of the Day?

  6. Andrew Mountford says:

    At some point even the Bluest Ribbons, the most pro Establishment, pro Beijing rimmers must realise we have become an International Bad Joke of a City…

  7. Introducing Radio Tediousvision Hong Kong says:

    The CCP do seem intent on closing every TV station by boring any viewers to death. They started out with CCATV and, after starting them on a downward slope, they’ve haven’t even bothered to wait for CCTVB to die before putting RTHK on a fast-track death spiral of tedium.

    To paraphrase Wilde, HKSARG’s latest jaunt is: “The unspeakable in full pursuit of the unwatchable.”

  8. Low Profile says:

    @Mark Bradley – but who’s gonna clean up all the rotten fruit that unpatriotic troublemakers may lob at the screens? I suppose they could pressgang working parties of those imprisoned for taking a peaceful unauthorised walk with their friends.

  9. Big Al says:

    “an audio feed of the rolling, non-stop, on-the-hour-every-hour, seven-days-a-week Carrie Lam In Your Face Every Day Show will also replace station announcements on the MTR and the ‘Yuu’ jingle in Wellcome supermarkets”
    If only it would replace that insidious song in the DON DON DONKI supermarkets, that would be actual progress …

  10. Kwun Tong Bypass says:

    Wow!
    How innovative!
    Self-applied brainwash!

    BTW, she will be re-elected in 2022 with a sweeping majority. Hong Kong people love her!

  11. dimuendo says:

    If the Carrie on RTHK is not a magnificent “troll” by Tom Grundy of HKFP then it finally justifies my complete inability, after 25 years in Hong Kong this time, to be able to speak (any version of) Chinese. Sadly, Mrs Lam’s omnipresence, will undoubtedly have the effect of making my children practice mandarin rather less.

  12. Stanley Lieber says:

    Cynicism is for losers!

    Hong Kong youth will enjoy greatly a holiday in “China’s Hawaii” whilst sampling “China’s Kentucky Fried Chicken” before returning to “China’s Bay Area” to look for a finance job on “China’s Wall Street” to raise money for powerful companies based in “China’s Silicon Valley”, after which they can go shopping on “China’s Fifth Avenue” or watch a patriotic film created in “China’s Hollywood”.

    In Lamb Chop We Trust!

  13. Onecyst says:

    Carrie’s literal echo chamber however 4 times a day might prove inauspicious.

  14. where's my jet plane says:

    As an attractive alternative the Elsie Leung Half-Hour is a must. Stupendous feats of logic from the grey-haired pin-up under the heading “There is No One Party Rule”. Sample double-think –
    She then stressed that China has a multi-party system, which is led by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). At the same time, the CCP is the ruling party, and this is set out in the constitution, she said.

    People should respect the constitution, and they should not say anything that challenges it, she added. (h/t RTHK)

    Trippy Days Are Here Again

  15. Where's my jet plane says:

    BTW has the ISD slipped up by naming the Carriefest simply Get To Know the Election Committee?
    Surely it ought to be Let’s Get To Know the Election Committee or the other standard, Together We Get To Know the Election Committee

  16. Low Profile says:

    Can we invite Guinness World Records to observe Carrie breakling the record for least listened to radio show?

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